Heavy Shoulders
by Violentredroses
Summary: Josie and her brother, J, get more than they expected when they moved in with their grandmother and uncles. Can they hold their own or will they shatter and fall? CraigxOC
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters , settings, or events of Animal Kingdom. They all belong to their creator.**

 **Warning: This story contains themes of violence and incest. If that stuff isn't your cup of tea, then I suggest not reading. (Also, then why are you watching Animal Kingdom? haha jk)**

She pedaled down the alley full speed. She hardly felt the sun beaming on her back or the window blowing through her hair. She could only focus on her burning knuckles. Her mind kept replaying the event on a loop the longer she pedaled. Would anyone have blamed her? They would've done the same in her position. Josie knew Adam could be sleazy, but she never considered him a liar. She'd gone over to his house to write a new song. She hadn't expect to come face-to-face with another girl. Slim and pale, Josie remembered the girl's defiant, annoyed face when she entered. Josie didn't know what happened next. She only remembered slamming her fist into Adam's jaw. She could hear his groan like an on going siren; she saw him clutching it even as she'd left him. Josie didn't know where else to go. She can't go back to work or to class. She wiped the tears stinging her eyes, and tried forgetting the entire thing.

Josie felt stupid. She'd felt so connected to Adam. He'd been funny and bright. She loved going to his shows and singing with him. They'd sit in his bedroom, strumming their guitars to their favorite songs. Those little moments with him made her forget what awaited her at home. She saw him being part of her future with Mom and J. Now, she'd be alone like always. She choked back a sob as she turned onto her street.

Passing old apartment buildings and dumpsters, she spotted her brother on the stairs. Joshua sat on the bottom step, wearing his old hoodie and worn out jeans. She noticed a black garbage bag sitting at his side. Looking over his brown curls and solemn eyes, she sensed it'd finally happened. He wasn't sad. He wasn't crying. Yet, there was something about him that told her he wasn't there. He was elsewhere, pondering on things that have happened. However, there was something different about this and it toiled in her stomach. All the sadness in her suddenly ceased when she stopped in front of him. Her burning hand, Adam's groan, and the other girl didn't mean anything. She stopped her bike a few feet from him, walking over to him with a backpack over her shoulder.

"J?" she called him. "What's wrong?" She sat beside him on the step. When he didn't answer, she asked again, "What happened? Is it mom? Is she okay?" Josie has a feeling she already knew the answer.

"She's dead," he said quietly.

Josie didn't speak for a second. For a moment, she wasn't sure whether she heard right or not. Josie always saw it coming. It'd only been a matter of time before her mother's addiction overwhelmed her. She tried feeling sad. She tried pitying the woman who'd given birth to her. Yet, nothing came. She looked over her brother, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. He rested his head on her shoulder. "Overdose?" she asked.

"Yeah," he whispered. "I was next to her, Jo. I was right there. We were watching TV and then I look over and she's not moving. She wasn't responding. I called the EMTs and they told me she'd died."

"J," she said. She patted his knee and squeezed it gently, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, J. I should've been here. You shouldn't have had to go through that alone."

He didn't say anything. He merely held her and rubbed her arm gently. "You fight with Adam?"

"I caught him in bed with some girl he met at a show," she said.

"Jo…" J sighed. He saw her red knuckles, "You hit him?"

"It just sorta happened," she explained. "That doesn't matter right now. Right now what matters is what we do now. I mean, my paycheck doesn't cover this apartment. Where we gonna go?"

"I took care of it."

"How?"

"Remember Grandma?" he turned to her, "Mom's mom?"

"Yeah," she nodded.

"I called her. Mom had her number somewhere in her room, so I called to see if she'd pick up." He sighed, "I didn't know who else to call. It's not like we have anyone else."

"I know," she said, rubbing his back. "I know. You did the right thing, J. It's just," she paused, "We haven't seen her since we were kids. Does she even remember us?"

"Of course I do," a woman's voice said.

Their grandmother looked quite young for her age. A slender blonde, Josie saw her age in the crows feet and laugh lines. She dressed in designer clothes with costly sunglasses covering her blue eyes. Josie stood up from the step, adjusting her bag on her shoulder. "Hey Grandma," she said.

"Hey baby," she said, coming down the steps and hugging her. A sweet-smelling perfume touched Josie's nose and it felt odd. Despite her pain, the world moved on without her. It'd pushed her from one incident into another without a second thought. Pulling away, her grandmother only smiled. "God, you're just as gorgeous as I expected," she said. Pushing a stray hair from Josie's face, she said, "Even your mother wasn't as pretty." She then noticed Josie's hand, "What happened here, honey?"

"Nothing to worry about," Josie said.

Her grandmother looked over her face a moment, but then said, "You and J are gonna be staying with me and your uncles. Why don't you wash up and pack your things? J and I will be in the car."

"Okay."

She went up the steps while J stayed with their grandmother. If Josie remembered correctly, people called her 'Smurf'. Why? She wasn't sure. Once she asked her mother, and never got a real answer. _'That's just what they call her, honey,'_ she'd said. Josie walked to her apartment and already found the door open.

The warm air felt stuffy when she entered. Josie guessed J turned off the air conditioning. She looked around and found J had picked up the coffee table and washed dishes. She couldn't take it. Everything was eerily the same. The row of shoes by the door, the ashtray full of cigarette butts, and even the needle and spoon still sat in their usual places. It'd was as if her mother simply left the house for a while. Moving towards her bedroom, her feet didn't even shuffle the carpet. Her mother's jacket still sat on the kitchen counter, and her keys hung from the hook. Josie picked up the black heels she found by the door and headed towards her mother's room instead. Going inside, nothing changed here either. She looked at the bed and nearly expected her mother to be there. Josie tried ignoring the long rubber tie and small stash tin on the dresser. She hated thinking this was how her mother ended. Anybody who hears about it will think her mother had been another trash junkie; not a loving mother of two children. She hated it.

Josie wiped herself off in the bathroom before stuffing her things into a trash bag like her brother. She shouldered her backpack, picking up her guitar case. She hadn't found the laptop, so she assumed J took it. Josie immediately began listing names in her head: she'd have to call their landlord, her boss, and J's school. She thought about Adam, who would've readily agreed to help her move. She could hear his voice over the phone, telling her he'd be over in a minute. The Adam she'd known would hold her close, let her cry and say nothing but sweet things. Instead, Josie simply closed the door behind her.

She walked to the large truck Smurf parked outside. Strapping into the backseat, she asked, "J, did you do your homework?"

"Yeah," he answered.

"Did you grab my laptop bag? I couldn't find it in my room."

"Got it right here," he picked it up between his legs and landed it to her.

"Thanks," she said.

Smurf began driving away. "You're still in school, Josie?"

"Uh yeah, college. J's still in high school," she answered.

"What are you studying?" she asked.

"Marine biology."

"Yeah, Jo really likes the ocean," J added. "She works at the aquarium by the beach."

"Really?" Smurf sounded impressed.

"It's more of a paid internship until I finish college," she said.

"What is it you do?"

"I work in the sea life section," she said. "It's basically a room with a big tank of fish living in their natural habitats. I give tours and tell people about the fish and the turtles and stuff."

Smurf smiled fondly, "I should've known. I remember when you were a little girl. You loved the ocean so much, we all thought you'd turn into a fish one day and swim away from us."

Josie laughed softly. She wished she could say she remembered too. She hardly recalled anything of her mother's family; she'd been so young. As they drove down the street, she tried adjusting to everything.

"I'm guessing the aquarium doesn't pay a whole lot?" Smurf asked, making a turn. "Especially if you were living in a little shithole like that."

"Well, I'm waiting until a full-time position opens up. Right now I'm an intern, so I don't get a full-time paycheck."

She'd planned on much better things for them when she got hired. They'd move out of the apartment and maybe get a nicer one or a house. Mom would have gone to a real rehab and gotten a job of her own. Josie could have added more money to J's college fund. The three of them would have been comfortable. Now, it'd be only her and J.

"And what about you, J?" Smurf asked him.

"Um, no. I don't have a job," he said awkwardly. "J-Jo doesn't want me working so I can focus on school."

"J's a really good student," Josie said. "He gets A's in everything. He even has a shot at a scholarship for a good university. I didn't want a job stressing him out when he should be studying."

"Who pays the bills then?"

"I do or well, did," Josie said. "We get by well enough."

Smurf looked at her in the rearview mirror as she drove. She grinned as if admiring her. "You have a good sister, J," she then said. "She takes good care of you."

"Yeah, she does I guess."

"How do you pay all of them?"

"Well, my job and the little side stuff I do," she said.

"Side stuff?"

"They pay her extra to fill in for the dolphin trainers," J answered, "And to work in the kids section."

"Wow," Smurf said. "Sounds like you have a lot on your plate, honey."

"It's nothing I'm not used to," she shrugged. "This is a nice truck, Smurf," Josie said, "Is it yours?"

"It was Pope's truck," she replied. "Your Uncle Andrew," she said to their questionable looks, "We got a few toys of our own at home, so you kids will never be bored. I'm also making cupcakes if you're both hungry."

"Thanks," Josie said.

They reached the house. Josie wasn't fully surprised by the luxurious house she lived in or the cars sitting outside. Her mother's family appeared to live well. It was odd that her mother never asked for their help. She thought of all the times a relative with money would've helped. They parked near the open garage and the three of them climbed out of the truck. J took her guitar case; she took the laptop and their trash bags. They followed Smurf into the house, where Josie could only eye the rest of their possessions. J walked close to her and caught her attention.

"Tommy came by before you came," he told her. "He was asking about his money. He said he would put Mom on the corner again if we didn't pay him."

"I don't think anyone is gonna want to fuck a dead woman," she replied. She noted the expensive mustang sitting in the garage before they entered the large house.

"What if he tries getting that money out of you?"

Josie shuddered at the thought. The image was washed out by the faint smell of smoke. The fire alarm blaring, Smurf stormed ahead of them into her kitchen, pulling burnt cupcakes out of the oven. Josie stopped by the kitchen and was reminded of the fancy kitchens they have on television. J nudged her to see the stack of hundreds on the counter. Who kept stacks of money sitting idly on a counter top? Then again, it must be only Smurf and her sons at home. Josie guessed there must be a thousand dollars or more there. She looked about the rest of the luxurious home. The odd feeling returned to her stomach.

"It's like we're orphan Annie coming to Daddy Warbuck's house," she joked.

J chuckled, "I think it's alright."

Josie led him behind Smurf to the backyard. Three men were hanging by the pool outside, none of them noticing Smurf approach them. One was brunet, another blond and the other was very noticeably large. Josie remembered them right away. Baz, the slim stocky brunet, climbed out of the pool as they approached him. Josie remembered him chasing her around on the beach once, but that was all. Deran and Craig pushed into each other, playfully smacking one another where they could. The blond, slim Deran used to let her ride his surfboard; Craig used to be the sea monster who'd hoist her into the air and "bite" her. Josie wished she remembered more.

 _'J must be having a harder time than me,'_ she imagined as they stopped near the trio. While Smurf scolded her sons on the negligence, Josie turned to her brother.

"I gotta go to work tomorrow morning," she said, "But if you want to stay home from school, that's okay. You can miss one day."

"Nah, it's cool," he said. "I'll go anyways."

"J…"

"It gives me something to do," he said. "Just like your job. I know that's why you're going."

"They asked me to do some overtime with the dolphins. It's the only reason I want to even go. Also, I'm going to need the phone tonight. There's some stuff I need to sort out with Bill about canceling our lease. I have to make some calls about our address change too. I'll see about getting us some phones of our own, kay?"

"You think we're gonna be here that long?" he asked her.

"But of course you are," Smurf interrupted with a smile. "Why wouldn't you?"

"Well," Josie said looking between her and J, "We wouldn't want to impose on you guys for too long."

J nodded in agreement, but Smurf dismissed them. "Oh you wouldn't be imposing, sweetheart." She hugged Josie again, "I wouldn't even dream about my babies going off on their own so quickly." She kissed their cheeks and turned to her sons. "Kids, you remember your uncles, right?"

Baz spoke first. "Sorry about your mom, guys."

"You look like Julia," Craig said to Josie. His hair was brown like his brother's, but hung down to his neck. With his goatee and muscles, he reminded her of a caveman almost. A very well kept caveman. "Doesn't she look like Julia?"

"Yeah, just blonder," Deran nodded, "And fitter than her. Julia was always a twig."

"Oh remember that time you two got really high and went at each other," Craig said to Smurf, "And she threw something at you? Uh what was it? It was...it was…"

"Coleslaw," Deran answered in a grin.

"Yeah coleslaw! She threw coleslaw at you and it got all over your face-"

"Guys…" Baz cut in between them. He looked to J and Josie and said, "Either of you want a beer or something? We got harder stuff, if you want, gin, whiskey, anything."

"I'll take a beer," Josie said, "J?"

"Nah, I'm good," he said. She understood his awkwardness. She couldn't help but feel the same.

Craig rifled in a nearby cooler and tossed her one. She caught it and popped it open. They noticed the red marks turning purple on her knuckles. "What happened there?" Craig asked. "You get into a fight or something?"

"Oh, it's nothing important," Josie said, putting her hand down and holding the beer in her other hand. "No big deal." She didn't really want to bring up Adam.

"Let me see," Smurf said, examining her hand, "Who was it?"

"Nobody important," she answered. "So, where are we staying?"

Smurf noticed the second subject change, but said nothing else. "You two can stay in Pope and Julia's rooms," she said. "Craig? Deran, show them to their rooms."

The two men nodded and they followed them. Deran led J towards a room adjacent to a small court area, and she followed Craig upstairs. "It's kinda fucked up she's making you sleep in here," Craig said as he opened a door on the right. "I don't know if I'd want to sleep in a dead woman's room."

"It's not like she died in here," she said as she walked in.

Her mother's old room wasn't as bare as she would've imagined. The walls were painted half aquamarine-half deep blue. She smiled softly seeing the little sea creatures painted along the border, as well as fish moving through the mural. "She painted this, right?" Josie asked, bending down to examine an animated crab clipping its claws on top of a rock.

"Yeah," he nodded, "Back when she used to paint and stuff."

"She talked about it one time," Josie said. "It's how I got into the ocean stuff."

Josie remembered it fondly. They watched ocean documentaries and read marine life stood up straight and put her bags on the bed. The rest of the room matched the nautical theme. It's as if her mother knew she'd sleep in here one day. She noticed Craig looking again.

"Um, thanks I got it from here," she said, catching his attention.

"Right," he nodded.

Baz and Deran then came in with a plasma television, brand new and untouched. "We got this one out of the shed," Baz said, "Deran found a second one for you."

"A second one?" she asked. "You guys just keep a stash of plasmas in your shed?" she joked.

He laughed, "Kind of. We just thought you might want one here. We can get you an attachment later."

"That's cool," she said, "Thanks."

"Also, if this room's too kiddie for you," Deran said, "We can repaint or whatever."

She shook her head, "No, no. It's perfect. I love it actually." She wouldn't paint over her mother's hard work.

"So, are you gonna tell us about that hand or do we have to guess?" Baz asked. They appeared more intrigued now than concerned.

"I hit my boyfriend when I caught him cheating," she admitted. "So, he's my ex-boyfriend now."

"Shit," Deran said, "And on the day your mom…you know…"

"Died? Yeah, it's been a fucked up day for me." She took another gulp of her beer and set it down. "And then I got all this shit to go through once I get the phone from my brother."

"That stuff can wait," Baz told her.

"Yeah, don't sweat that right now," Craig said.

She wished she could let it go, but if she didn't do it then who would?


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey Bill, it's Josie from apartment 203? Haha, yeah, I was wondering if I could talk to you about our lease…Yeah, that's right. She died, yeah…Thank you…My brother and I are gonna be living with our grandmother now, and I was just wondering about our lease...Yeah, okay...No problem. I can give you the rent this Saturday, if that's cool? Okay. Perfect. See you, Bill."

She hung up the phone and rested it on her bed. She sighed deeply, running her hands through her hair. Her entire body felt heavy. She fell back against her bed, arms splayed as she closed her eyes. She'd spent quite a while calling schools and companies. Honestly, it was enough to make her head explode. As if life wasn't getting hard enough. Her mind was already on funeral arrangements. She'd feel awkward asking for Smurf's help. She knew her grandmother would insist on helping. Josie wasn't sure if that'd be okay. Her mother never spoke about Smurf or their family. The only time she did was through snide comments or whenever a detective came around asking about them. Even then, as the woman barked question after question, her mother kept quiet. She guessed it must've been out of loyalty.

Picking up her guitar case, she pulled out Diamond. Josie instantly took the guitar into her lap and strummed a few chords. Everything felt wrong. Normally at this time, she'd be preparing dinner for herself and J. Their mother would be on the street paying Tommy back one man at a time. Instead, their mother laid in a morgue while she sat in a nice house. Playing a soft melody, she tried forgetting the day. The world was quiet in her room. It made her feel as if she sat at the bottom of the ocean.

"Hey honey," a soft voice said.

Josie tilted her head upward to see Smurf at her doorway. She sat up and turned towards her. "Hey," she said.

"Dinner's ready if you're hungry," she said.

"Thanks."

Smurf hesitated for a moment and then said, "Josie, there's something I've noticed between you and J." She walked into the room and sat on the bed. "You seem to be the grown up. You took on all these responsibilities on your own: school, work, paying bills, and taking care of your brother. You had to grow up so quickly when Julia started using. I know it couldn't have been easy. I bet you cooked too?"

"Sometimes J did," she said. "He also helped clean and took care of Mom. It gave him something to do."

"But that's a lot for a young woman to handle."

She scoffed, "Tell me about it. It certainly doesn't help when your boyfriend proves to be an asshole just like the rest of them. Can you believe I fucking went over there and the girl he was with tried to kick me out? Like he was hers and I was nothing. Unbelievable..." She reined herself back in and said, "Sorry. It's just been a long day."

"No worries, sweetie," she said. "Your mom always had the same problem with men; so did I. I don't blame you for what you did." She smiled, stroking Josie's hair, "You're here now. You have people who will take care of you both."

"You don't have to," she said. "J and I are good just the two of us."

"Don't be silly," she told her. "You're both family. You don't have to be on your own."

"We were alone for ten years," she simply stated. "We're used to being on our own."

Smurf paused. Josie expected resentment in her eyes, but instead she was met with apologies. "I know, baby. When your mom left, I tried calling her so many times to get her to come home. She never answered. Even Baz and Pope tried getting her back. She wouldn't listen." She scooted closer, "I'm sorry you two went through all that alone. You were only a child and you had to grow up so quickly. You should have been out having fun, not working your ass off to pay bills."

"And Mom's burial," she sighed.

"Don't you worry about that," she said, "I got that covered."

"You do?"

"It's one less thing for you to worry about, sweetheart," she said. "Come downstairs for dinner. You and your uncles can catch up with each other."

She slid off the bed and walked with her downstairs. She saw Deran and Craig already at the table, eating the pot roast Smurf made. Josie didn't expect such a feast: mashed potatoes, string beans with biscuits and butter. She bet there was cupcakes also. They both noticed her there, but she just nodded at them and sat down. She then saw J was missing.

"Where's J?" she asked Smurf.

"In his room," she said as she took a seat. "He said he wasn't hungry."

"Ah alright then," she said, grabbing the spoon for the mashed potatoes.

"You're not gonna go burst into his room and demand he eat?" Deran asked.

"He's been through a lot today. I don't want to push him."

"You really care about him, don't you?" Craig asked. His question was soft. He was gentle when he spoke to her.

"I do," she nodded, getting a slice of pot roast. "I've been taking care of him since he was nine. He never gets into trouble, so it's been pretty easy."

"But I bet it is," he smirked.

The smirk. She couldn't help the tightness in her chest as she cut a piece of pot roast. "I guess," she said, "I try not doing anything too terrible. I couldn't look after him if something happened."

"Well he's in good hands now," he said, "So, being a little naughty wouldn't hurt, right?"

He was bold, she gave him that. She laughed before eating some more of the roast, "I suppose."

"This roast is great, Smurf," Daren said, cutting through the tension.

"Yeah, it's great," she turned to her grandmother, "It's the best thing I've eaten in a while."

"Next time I can show you how to make my spicy chili," she winked, "Best around."

"That'd be great."

She spent the rest of dinner talking to the family. Josie searched for a better feel in them. If she and J would be staying with them, they'd need a proper foothold. Clearly, they'd walked into a tightly knit family. Smurf doted on her sons any chance she got; she answered all of her questions. Yet, something felt off. She couldn't shake it no matter how much food she ate. The way Craig looked at her, the way Smurf smiled at her sons. It seemed abnormal almost. She couldn't place why, and maybe she didn't want to either.

"We're having a little party tomorrow afternoon," Smurf told her towards the end of dinner, "Sort of a little welcoming party for you both."

"Thanks, but I work tomorrow. J will be staying home though," she said, "Even if he would probably insist on going to school"

"If J can skip school, I'm pretty sure you can miss work," Smurf said, picking up the empty plates.

"I'm filling in for one of the dolphin trainers," she said, "So if I bail last minute I wouldn't be doing them any favors."

"Dolphins?" Deran questioned her.

"Josie works at the aquarium by the beach," Smurf said quite proudly as she went to rinse off the dishes.

"Actually, it's more of sanctuary than a real aquarium," she added. "A majority of the animals there are rescues, have special needs or are endangered."

"That's awesome," Craig said. "You get to work with them all the time?"

"Not all the time," she said. "I mainly do tour guides and work with the kids, but sometimes I get to work with the dolphins. They're my favorites."

"And sharks?" Deran asked.

"We have a few," she confirmed, "But they're third for me."

"What?" he said, "Sharks are the fucking best."

"I know what I'm doing tomorrow," Craig said, getting up from the table.

"Shit, me too," Deran said, following him. "I want to see some fucking sharks."

"You and the damn sharks," Craig scoffed.

"Hey, at least I don't like whales."

"Whales are cool. Don't talk shit about whales," Craig snapped at him.

"Boys," Smurf intervened, "Remember what I said about tomorrow?"

They both stopped to look over at her. A silent reminder settled between the three of them, and Josie caught it right away.

"I'm gonna go check on J before I go to bed," she said, standing up and leave them to their conversation.

She walked into J's new bedroom, seeing the dim lighting giving off a bluish glow. He sat on the bed, writing down equations from his math book into his notes. She watched him work quietly. He would get on better with their relatives than her. Then again, people tended to like J more. She supposed that was a perk to being the quiet one.

"Thought you did your homework?" she asked, leaning against a wall.

"I didn't have time to finish math," he answered, scribbling out one equation. "Tommy and Adam keep texting the phone."

"That doesn't matter right now," she said, "Come on. I saved you a plate for dinner; you have to eat."

"I'm not really hungry right now."

"Bullshit," she said, "You haven't eaten since we left Mom's."

"Jo, come on."

She sighed. "Is it this house? Nerves bugging your stomach?" She sat down on his bed.

"Kind of," he said. The phone buzzed beside him again. "Adam's pretty insistent on talking to you."

"I have nothing to say to him." Josie stared around his room, "How do you like your new room? Pretty nice."

"It's okay," he shrugged.

"We can go to the store on Saturday," she said, "Buy some decorations and spruce this place up a bit?"

"No, I like it this way," he said. "Yours is cool though. It suits you."

"I guess," she said.

There was a silence between them for a moment. "Jo?"

"Yeah?"

"What are we gonna do about Mom?" he asked. "Shouldn't we have like a funeral or a burial or something?"

"Smurf said she'd take care of it," she said.

"And what about Tommy?"

"What about him?"

"He keeps asking about the money. What if tries getting it when we go over there? I don't want him hurting you, Jo."

"We don't have $90 and she's dead," she scoffed, "There's nothing for him to take."

"I have some money for when you go back," he said, "So he won't bother you." He pulled a wad of hundred dollar bills from his pocket, "Baz gave it to me for shoes, but you only need like $100."

She grinned softly at him. "No, get new shoes. You need them. Don't worry about Tommy. I'll take care of him."

He nodded, and then said, "So what do you think? About Grandma and the rest?"

"They're okay. I mean, they're not terrible. It's just…"

"That we haven't seen them in like ten years," he finished.

"Yeah," she agreed, "These people-they're practically strangers. I barely remember anything about them. All I remember is Mom not liking Smurf and wanting us to stay away from them. I had no idea why, but I think I'm starting to see it." When he raised an eyebrow, she continued, "And there's something going on here. Who just has plasmas sitting in their shed? They have a motorcycle, a jeep, nice truck and a damn mustang; Smurf wears designer clothes and real jewelry. They even have a fucking jet ski. How do they make all the money to get all this nice shit? Who's paying for all of this?"

"Maybe they have some money put away," he said.

"Maybe," she rested back on his bed, feeling the soft covers beneath her. "I don't know, J. This whole thing is just weird. All of it. It's like life bought a new blender and wants to test it out."

He lied beside her on his back, "You're just not used to having someone else take care of things."

"That's not-"

"-It so is," J defended. "You've always taken care of stuff: the bills, Mom, me, your job, and your classes. Now, there's someone else who can take care of us. It's not your problem anymore."

"I'm the oldest," she said. "When Mom started using, there was nobody to care for us. We were alone. Where were they when we went hungry cause Mom spent our food money? Smurf told me that she tried calling Mom and convince her to come back home. Why wouldn't Mom come back if she was clearly better off here? Why did they stop trying? Did they just give up? They were here doing God knows what. They certainly weren't giving a shit about us."

"Mom might've not said anything to them," he suggested. "She was too high to tell anyone anything. She and Smurf must've had a falling out and, you know, shit got complicated. It's nobody's fault."

It was their mother's fault. It was Smurf's fault. It was Deran's, Craig's, and even Baz's fault. None of them came when they knew their sister was suffering. Mom's drug habit wasn't a secret. Surely they knew she'd end up in the gutter or the street. Did they not care? When did they stop caring? So many questions ran through her mind at the moment.

"Whatever. It just seems too weird that she came rushing over once you called her when she showed no interest before."

"It is," he said. "Today was so awkward."

"Today has been awkward," she said, "And I have a feeling it'll only get more awkward." She sat up in the bed and looked over at him, "I'm gonna shower and then head to bed, kay?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I'll finish my homework and go to bed too."

"Good." She mussed his hair, grinning at him. A shower sounded perfect at the moment. She charged the phone in the bathroom, putting her favorite playlist on shuffle and began undressing.

* * *

 _"They don't trust us," Deran said to his mother once they heard the music in the bathroom. "At least, Josie doesn't anyways."_

 _"She's used to being the parent," Smurf said. "She's only protecting him."_

 _"From what?" Craig asked them._

 _"She's not like J," Smurf said. "She knows something is up and it makes her distrustful. Once he's in on jobs, she'll be the first to be against it."_

 _"And he'll listen," Deran said._

 _"So? Wouldn't she be in on them too?" Craig asked._

 _"She would know about it," Deran added. "She could roll on us just as easily as J if she knew."_

 _"That's why I want you boys to test him out," she said. "See what he can handle."  
_

 _"What about Josie?"_

 _"I'll handle Josie. You two focus on J."_

 _They nodded at her demand. As Deran made his leave, she kept Craig back. He already knew what she was going to tell him. Craig hadn't been very subtle in his leering, he knew this. His comment at dinner didn't help either. He stood in front of her, his mother a head and some inches shorter than him. Arms crossed, she said, "She's your niece, honey."_

 _"I don't know what you're talki-"_

 _"-Don't bullshit me," she said. She came closer, rubbing his large arms softly, "I saw you staring at her today, and we were all there when you hit on her." He cursed himself now for not being more discrete about it.  
_

 _When he looked away in shame, she tilted his head back to her. She didn't disapprove or appear disgusted by him. She seemed comforting. Craig supposed he shouldn't be surprised. It wouldn't be the first time. "I know she's a pretty girl, baby. She's absolutely gorgeous and she's not blind either. She's like me. She knows a real man when she sees one."_

 _"Yeah, but it's not like that."_

 _"It's not like she's sixteen," she gave a quick laugh. "She's 21. She's a grown woman who knows what she wants. I like that about her."_

 _Smurf? Like another woman? Especially around her sons? It didn't sound like her. "You do?"_

 _"Yes," she said. "She's one of my babies. Why wouldn't I?" She pushed some hair from his face, "She's had it rough for a very long time. She just got out of a bad break up and her mother's dead. A girl like her needs to feel special every so often, especially since her boyfriend cheated on her from what she told me. She might not be feeling her best right. Pretty girl like her could use some attention."  
_

 _"Smurf..." He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He wasn't sure exactly his mother implied, but it made him uneasy._

 _"I'm not telling you to sleep with her," she retorted. "I'm just saying, I wouldn't be bothered if you gave her some extra attention. It wouldn't be the first time it happened either."  
_

 _Craig shuddered. He recalled the first time just like the rest of them. Baz said she must feel guilty now seeing Josie and J in person. Josie looked nothing like Julia. Her light blonde hair, striking blue eyes and clever smile reminded him of only one person. Looking down at Smurf, he wondered if his mother regretted what happened. Why didn't she fight for her? Why did she let Julia just run off? He thought it best not to ask._

 _She then said, "I just want her to be comfortable with us. J will be easy because he's a boy. I'll do a majority of the work, but it never hurts if you want to pitch in."  
_

 _"Right," he shifted from one foot to another. Craig couldn't believe what she'd told him. He couldn't hit on Josie. She was his niece. He wouldn't go down the same road as Pope. Yet, the thought of Josie's slim figure made him shiver.  
_

 _"I'll tell you this," she said, coming closer to him, the threat in her eyes, "If anything does come out of this, and you anything that girl doesn't want, you'll be answering to me. Understood?"_

 _"Yeah," he nodded._

 _"Alright then," her motherly softness reappeared and she kissed his lips gently. He briefly thought of someone else he could kiss harder, longer and more passionately. "I was just looking," he said, "I don't plan on anything happening or whatever."_

 _"Well, if something does come out of it," she said, "Just keep it behind closed doors."  
_


	3. Chapter 3

When she woke up the next day, she nearly forgot where she was. She'd expected herself to be lying in her bed back in the apartment. She'd smell cigarette smoke and her sheets. She'd hear J's footsteps outside her door in the kitchen, probably preparing coffee before school. Yet, the scent of bacon brought her into her surroundings. It hit her once more. Mom really had died yesterday and she truly did live in this house now. It hadn't been a dream. Slipping out of her bed in her long shirt and underwear, she could hear a whirling sound coming from downstairs. She assumed Smurf was blending or processing something in the kitchen. Fixing her skewed shirt, she walked to the bathroom where she began her usual routine.

In the mirror, she looked like hell. Her skin was pastier than usual, the bags more noticeable in the light. She ran a hand through her blonde waves, noticing her knuckles right away. The bruises weren't as terrible as expected. A small spot took over the center knuckle, and the others appeared faded. Nobody would see the damage if she was smart. As she brushed her teeth, she remembered the dream she'd been having, but wished she couldn't.

She'd been standing in the middle of the apartment again. Her mother sat slumped on the couch beside J, who blankly stared at their television. Josie hardly noticed him there. She could only see her mother. Her light eyes stared into nothingness; her waxy skin was tinged green and purple. As hard as she tried, Josie couldn't make her respond. She felt enraged at once. She didn't know what to do. She couldn't control it anymore. It exploded seemingly out of nowhere.

 _'Why didn't you care?!'_

 _'We needed you and you weren't there!'_

 _'Why didn't you try getting better for us? Were we not enough for you?!'_

 _'Mom! Mom! Are you listening?! Mom!'_

Josie spat into the sink and stared into the mirror. She began brushing her hair into its normal waves as she thought. No, they hadn't been enough. Regardless of rehab tricks and detoxing her in her bedroom, Julia always managed to relapse. Josie would come home and find her shooting up or buying drugs from Tommy. She'd tell Josie how sorry she was, and that she'd tried harder next time. Yet, that was only another lie. She couldn't even stay clean long enough to hold down a job. When she wanted money, she'd either steal it from Josie or work the corner in a skirt and heels. She'd have done anything for a fix. It broke Josie's heart the first few times. Eventually, it just became another family thing. Josie realized she didn't care anymore. She wanted drugs more than them, and Josie learned to deal with that.

Once she'd tied up her hair, she entered the kitchen where she found Smurf sticking fruits and vegetables into a blender, and Baz and Deran seated at a side counter with a large paper unfolded before them. Their words were drowned out by the sound of Smurf's blender, but it didn't stop her from noticing the floor plan they talked over. Josie grabbed a cup of coffee, noting that J and she could use their own mugs from home. All the chores from last night came flooding back to her in an instant, reminding her for the day before. It was exhausting.

"Morning honey," Smurf said to her as she took a seat at the island counter. "How'd you sleep? How about those sheets, huh?"

"Yeah, they were great," Josie replied. "500 thread count, right?"

Smurf nodded, "Only the best for my babies. Are you hungry? I can whip you and J some eggs and bacon?"

"Sure," she nodded. "Did he eat his plate last night? Do you know?"

She shook her head, "Found it in the microwave this morning."

"Then definitely make some, please," Josie said. "I don't know how he goes so long without eating anything."

"He's probably got a lot on his mind," Baz said. "He'll be hungry when he gets here."

"I hope so," she said. She'd have him go get their money from the apartment. Josie hid it away in the flour container where her mother wouldn't find it. She watched Smurf begin whipping up some eggs before J walked into the room. From the messy curls and the bit of sweat on his shirt, she could tell he'd slept pretty well. He hadn't even changed out of last night's clothes. "Good morning," she said, "Jesus, you look like something picked up from a gutter."

"At least I don't look like I just stepped out of a coffin," he joked, punching her arm lightly.

"Smurf's making us breakfast," she said.

"Uh no, I'm good," he said, "I can just start with some coffee."

"J, you didn't eat anything last night," Josie said, sipping her coffee, "You're eating."

"I have school," he said. "I can just get something on the way."

"I told you that you didn't have to go," she said. "Please J, just sit down and relax. Smurf's making us breakfast, and it'd be rude not to eat it."

"Ugh, fine," J sighed, getting his coffee. "I always forget how annoying you can be in the morning."

"He's not six, Josie," Deran said.

"No, but he acts like it," she smirked at J from the counter.

"Oh, she only cares about her baby brother," Smurf defended, placing some bacon on a skillet. "Sit down, baby. Breakfast is almost ready."

J took his seat beside Josie, and sighed. He put his head on her shoulder. "I had such a fucked up dream," he whispered between them, eyes closing a moment.

"Me too," she said. "It was about Mom."

"So was mine."

She patted his hand on the counter and continued drinking her coffee as she listened to the sound of whirling blender and crackling bacon. The tranquility was broken by a loud voice from down the upstairs hall. "What did I say?!" Craig popped up from the overhang looking over the kitchen, "What did I say if it woke me up again?!"

"Here he goes," Deran muttered.

"Just do it already, man," Baz said.

He was completely naked, and seeing a naked Craig was the last thing she thought she'd see. Sipping from her coffee mug, she tried ignoring the member swinging whenever he moved. It was nice when she quickly glanced. He wasn't too large, but he was proportionate for a man his height. Her cheeks grew hot and she turned towards J.

Craig unplugged the blender from the outlet and looked around, "Where's the hammer?! Huh?! Where's the hammer?!"

"Can't you just smash it on the floor?" Baz asked.

"You don't think I'll do it! I'll fucking do it!" Craig retorted.

"Baby, but you bought that for me!" Smurf told him.

"No I didn't-"

"-Yes you did. You always forget my birthday, so I bought it for you and gave it to myself. I wrapped it up real nice, and I loved it, baby. I really did," she said.

Craig settled down, nodding as he put it back on the counter. Baz and Deran shared amused grins before Baz said, "Dude, don't you think you should go put something on?"

"Yeah," Deran agreed, "There's a lady here." He gestured to Josie. They said it more for humiliation than chivalry.

It's as if he just remembered Josie and J were there. She expected a lopsided grin or him to instantly cover up from embarrassment. However, all he did was nod at them, "Morning."

"Morning," Josie laughed over her coffee.

"You don't…" he pointed to his naked body, "You don't mind right?"

They shook their heads. "It's your house," Josie said.

"Feel free to join if you want," he said, more to Josie than J.

"Seriously, bro?" Deran said.

"She's your niece, dude," Baz said, balling up a paper and throwing it at him.

"I was just saying," Craig said, walking over to the coffee pot and pouring himself a cup, "Makes it less awkward."

"No," Baz said, shaking his head, "No, it doesn't."

"And I'm pretty sure J doesn't want to see his sister naked," Deran said added.

"She's in her panties," Craig commented over his mug.

"But at least that's clothing," Josie said, "And I have a shirt to cover them."

Something in his face told her he wished she didn't have anything on. Then he looked away shamefully before anyone saw him. She looked to Smurf, who chimed in, "And she has some modesty."

She handed J and Josie their plates. J dug into his almost instantly, while Josie ate calmly. She had enough time before work. "J, I talked to Bill last night and he says all we have to do is pay this month's rent." She scooped up some eggs and said, "The money's in the usual place, so you can just get it and take it to him."

"Yes, Mom," J joked before biting into his bacon.

Josie smacked his arm and said, "It'd only take a few minutes. Plus, I thought you were so worried about me going over there?"

"I would've gone with you," he said.

"The boys can take J for a while," Smurf intervened "There's a six-footer out today, isn't there Craig?"

He turned to his mother and then to J, "Yeah, there is. You should come."

"Do you surf?" Deran asked.

"I get by," J answered. "Do you wanna come, Jo?"

"I got work," she said, "You go. You could use some fun." She kissed his forehead and then rinsed out her plate in the sink. "You all can go after, if you want. I'm going to take the bike," she told him, "Since you're going with them."

"Okay."

"Oh honey, you don't have to do that," she said. "Craig can take you."

"Oh no," she shook her head, "It's cool. I always pedal there."

"Don't be complicated, Jo," J pleaded from his spot. "Just go in the car. It won't kill you."

"I'm not being complicated," she said.

"Yeah, you are."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not, you little shit," she smiled.

"Kids," Smurf cut in, "Josie, go with Craig. I'm sure he wouldn't mind, would you baby?"

"Nah," he shook his head, downing the rest of his coffee. "I wouldn't mind at all."

"Okay," she gave into them, "As long as you don't drive naked. That's just taking it too far."

They all laughed as she walked away. She heard Baz then say, "I can say this because I'm not your real uncle, but your sister does have a nice ass, J."

"Yeah, she does," the other two agreed.

Josie began preparing for work. Not needing her uniform for the day, she only packed her wallet and phone. She knew J would do what she asked, but she was glad he was finally getting some fun. Josie often felt guilty that J hardly went out. The only place he went was to Nicky's house, and honestly, Josie wished he'd go anywhere else. She slipped on an off-shoulder flowing midriff, shorts for the day and tied up her hair before heading back out into the kitchen.

"Have a good day, sweetie," Smurf said, handing her a lunch, "Everything will be ready by the time you come back."

"Thanks," she smiled, taking the lunch.

She passed J as she left the kitchen, mussed his hair and muttered a 'be good' to him. Her whole body felt electrified walking with Craig. She wasn't sure why, but it could be because he'd worn his hair half up and his clothes did nothing to hide his broad shoulders. Most of the guys she knew cut their hair short or shaved one side or change it to bright colors like neon blue or green. They were either skinny or relatively healthy, though not like Craig. Adam was a stick compared to a giant like Craig. Josie took Adam out of her head. He was the last person she wanted to think about.

Sliding into the jeep, she said, "Let me guess, she told you not to take me on your bike?"

Craig laughed, turning on the engine, "Yeah. She said you'd get hurt."

Josie snorted, "It's not like I've never been on a motorcycle before. I'm not a baby."

"Oh, but she's gonna treat you and J like it," he said. "She does it with all of us, so don't feel too bad about it."

They peeled out of the driveway and drove towards the beach now. Stray strands of hair flowed in the wind, and she could already smell the salt in the air. She guessed the wind was coming inland today, which meant that the aquarium will smell more like beach than humid water. She felt a vibration in her pocket, and pulled out the phone to see Adam's text.

 _'Are you at work?'_ it read. _'Please, I wanna see you. I wanna talk about this. I miss you.'_

She ignored the messages and turned the phone on silent. She couldn't believe the nerve of him.

"Your ex?" Craig asked.

"Yeah," she sighed, crossing her arms. "How'd you know?"

"Everybody gets that face when their ex texts them," he said. "He wants to get back with you, doesn't he?"

"He does," she said. "He wants to 'talk about it' or whatever. What's there to talk about? He's an asshole and an idiot. I don't even know why I liked him."

"Because he seemed good at the time," he answered. "I mean, I can't really blame him for trying. I can be an idiot and an asshole, and if I lost a girl like you I'd be doing the same thing."

Had he really said that? Surely, he meant it in an 'uncle-doting-on-his-niece' way. "And also the fact that you look like Tarzan when he crawled out of the jungle doesn't help."

His smile gave her butterflies. "Oh, so that's what we're doing now, huh?" he said, "Okay. Wanna know who called me last night?"

"Who?" she smiled, already knowing the punch line.

"Dracula," he said, "He wanted to know when you were coming back to the castle."

She lightly punched his arm as they both laughed. Then he said, "Is that seriously all you got? I barely felt that."

"Bullshit," she said, hitting him again.

He shook his head, "Nope."

She did it again a little harder, and he only chuckled. "That one tickled," he japed. "Did you actually hit a person yesterday or were they imaginary?"

She couldn't stop laughing. He didn't feel like an uncle. He didn't talk like one. She sat with him in the car as if they were friends off to the beach. It concerned her but at the same time she wasn't bothered.

 _'It's because you haven't seen him in ten years,'_ she rationalized. _'He's your uncle, stupid. He's only being nice because Adam and you broke up. Uncles do stuff like that all the time.'_

She wasn't sure about that. She'd spent most of her life without the Codys. They were always blurred faces in her memories with muffled voices. She only remembered the small things.

"You used to put me on your shoulders," she then said.

"What?"

"When I was seven and J was three," she said. "When we'd go to the beach together, Mom always forgot my sandals so the sand burned my feet. You'd then pick me up and put me on your shoulders because you were the tallest."

He hesitated and then nodded, "Yeah. Yeah, I remember that. Smurf used to douse you in sunscreen because she didn't want you getting burned."

"We used to make sandcastles too," she added. "I remember us collecting sea shells and taking them home. She'd always let me keep the pretty ones."

Her laughter died in her throat. She remembered everything slightly more vivid than before. Those had been better times. Josie recalled lying in bed some nights and wishing she'd magically wake up as the seven-year-old girl on the beach. "That's really the only thing I remember anymore," she told him. "I sort of forgot the rest."

"And that's not really a bad thing," he said. "You can make new ones now."

His free hand fell on her knee casually and gently. It didn't feel odd or strange. It was comforting to have his hand there. His palm felt rough against her soft skin and radiated her entire body. His thumb sitting on her knee cap didn't help either. She tucked hair behind her ear and looked over at him.

"I suppose I can," she said.

He parked outside the aquarium where she saw people already filling the ticket lines and going inside. Parents rented strollers from the guest booth and children came off a school bus in a single line. She inhaled the sea air coming in from the beach and couldn't get enough. The sudden rush of adrenaline hit her when she looked at the building. Her eyes fell on the sign above the entrance. _'Lowe Park Aquarium and Animal Reserve',_ it read. Then she noticed a very familiar figure standing out in the crowd.

"Oh fuck me backwards," she grunted.

Adam was the only person she knew who wore combat boots, a flannel shirt and torn jeans to the goddamn beach. Anything to play his role as the rebellious punk was worth it to him. She already felt annoyed.

"What?" Craig asked, looking around Adam's direction. "That's him?" he sounded unimpressed and even a bit surprised.

"Yeah," she sighed.

"He's a fucking twig," he said. "I don't think it's a good idea for him to be out on a windy day. The wind might blow him over."

He alleviated her knots with his laugh. "Yeah, especially in that flannel," she said.

Adam then noticed her. He waved right away and began making his way towards the jeep. Josie suddenly wished she hadn't come to work after all.

"Fuck, he's coming over here," she hissed.

Craig stayed silent for a moment, and then leaned over, "Kiss me."

"What?!"

"Just do it," he said. "Trust me, it'll work."

She looked him over, and then nodded. She stayed glued to her seat as Craig leaned into her. It was so wrong. It was very, very wrong and she shouldn't have agreed to this. He titled her head towards him and his lips attached to hers. The kiss wasn't small or brief. Craig's kiss was long and passionate like a lover's. His tongue licked at her bottom lip before she let him into her. Her hand fell into the crook of his arm, feeling his warm skin and hard muscles. His beard tickled her upper lip and chin, but she didn't care. Their kiss became heated. He suckled on her lips and she tugged on his. It's as if they suddenly forgot the most important fact. It didn't matter right then. His lips were delicate with her, yet desperate for her taste. Her core already tightened from this kiss alone.

He pulled away in a few light brushes and a nose nuzzle. In that moment, he stared back into her eyes with more than kissing on his mind. "Get out of the car and pretend you never saw him," he instructed, "It'll drive him crazy. Trust me."

"Okay," she said breathlessly, "Bye Craig."

"Bye," he said. He added another kiss for good measure before she slipped out of the car.

She was shaking. She concealed her wobbly knees and blushing cheeks from the people around the further she got from the car. Adam came into her sight and she coughed the nerves out. Her mind completely forgot about him and thought about what had just happened.

"Hey Josie," Adam said, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"Oh, hey," she said. His lips were ecstasy that charged through her body. She could still feel them.

"Who was that?" he asked, nodding to where the truck had been.

She absolutely, positively could not tell him the truth. "A guy I met the other night," she said, moving past him to the entrance.

"A guy?" he followed her, "You're already seeing other guys?"

"Why do you care?" she said. "You were seeing other girls when we were still together, so why does it matter if I see guys when we break up?" She then added, "And I'm not seeing him."

"Then why was he kissing you?" he asked defensively. "We're broken up one day and you're already hooking up with other guys?"

"Let me tell you something," she rounded on him. "You are in no position to be bitching and whining about what I do with other people. You were the one who cheated. You were the one who went behind MY back and fucked some groupie you met at a show. You don't get to fucking say that shit to me. Go home. Leave me alone."

"Josie," he said, "Look, I'm sorry. I know I don't get a say in what you do. You know, your body's like your own business and stuff. I just like don't want some random guy like taking advantage of you. Plus, that dude looks a lot older than you, so he could be like married or some shit-"

"-Oh fuck off," she rolled her eyes, "Don't act like you care about me."

"I do," he replied. "I'm sorry for what I did. I'd taken a shit ton of X and was feeling all horny and stuff. You know how I get when I take ecstasy."

"That's not an excuse," she said. "You could have said no and gone home, and you didn't. You decided to fuck someone else. I'm done with you, Adam. We're done."

Her mind went back to the truck as she went past the employee line where she flashed her ID at the guard. She felt queasy. Her mind swam like the fish in the tanks, and she suddenly didn't care for the tranquil scene around her. Josie couldn't tell anyone what happened in the jeep. Not even J, especially not J. Their shared moment would stay with her and her only. Entering the locker room, she opened her locker and found her wet suit. She had work to do.


End file.
